Honour and My Study of Budo

By Jeff Jodoin

Following my exam for shodan at the Budo Yoseikan, North American Hombu Dojo in Torrance, California in August 2008, I was asked to write about my understanding of honour and its application in my budo study. What follows are my own thoughts and understanding at this point in my life. For the purpose of this essay, the term teacher is an inference to both my direct teacher as well as the line of teachers before them on the budo path.

Honour is the code of conduct that I refer to when I make decisions; honour is doing what I feel is morally and ethically right, with a consideration for myself and others. This includes future generations as well. That which is right, is determined in my mind based on ethics and morals that I learned and continue to learn from people and events.

When I was born I began life with a breath. This was one of the first decisions I made upon entering the world. Albeit a subconscious, instinctual decision, my body and mind had to make this decision in order to continue living. From this point in life forward, I have been confronted with millions of choices and every decision I took had consequences to one degree or another. At first my decisions were based on physiological needs for survival. For example, deciding to cry in demand for food and water to satisfy my hunger and thirst. As I developed and fulfilled my basic needs, I moved onto other higher level needs, each of which required a decision on my part.

If I imagine every passing decision as a footstep, I can look back and see the path that has lead me to this very moment as I write these words. But where do I go from here? The path that lies ahead of me is not only determined by where I want to go, it is also a result of where I have come from. For this reason it is crucial to reflect on important decisions before taking action. On one hand, my decisions are based on what I believe to be the right thing to do. However, once I make a decision, I must live with the consequences, knowing that there are no perfect decisions. With this in mind, the decision making process becomes an important element to consider when discussing the topic of honour.

My intentions colour my actions. Once I have determined in my mind something to be right, then my decision should reflect this in order to be honest with myself and act in an honourable manner. If I act counter to what I feel is right, I have to live with the consequences of my personal integrity being damaged and the loss of trust and confidence from others. Doing what is right comes from a sense of duty and sometimes requires courage to make unpopular decisions. Take for example the role a parent plays in relation to their child. A parent with their child’s best interest at heart will make decisions and take actions based on a duty to raise their child to the best of their ability. The parent will require courage to make some decisions and to stick to their decisions when the child offers resistance. It may take a few moments or even years before the child develops an understanding. In the end, the child learns a valuable lesson which can be carried forward to future generations.

In the study of budo, the principle mentioned above applies to the student-teacher relationship as well. Honour plays a role both in the relationship that I have with my teacher, seniors and juniors, as well as with the teaching itself. If I choose to be a student, I must be willing to learn in order to receive teachings and have the opportunity to develop an understanding. Just as the child trusts their parent to act in their best interest, I must have trust in my teacher to do and show the right thing. When I have trust in my teacher I give myself the opportunity to develop an understanding of things, even if, at the immediate moment I do not understand.

Trust is not intrinsic and should not be given blindly. It is fostered over time through interaction. It is a bonding process that includes my collective experience with someone based on their words and actions. I should ask myself, does my teacher act with honour? Does he or she live according to what they teach? Does my teacher make decisions based on convenience, or from a sense of duty regardless of potential resistance? If I come to understand that my teacher has my best interests at heart, I can give myself the opportunity to accept a correction and improve myself. Although my ego may temporarily suffer, I can get passed this by reflecting on the intention of the correction and see that it was for my benefit, and thus for the benefit of others as well. The process of accepting a correction should be accompanied with a desire for comprehension.

If I follow my teacher blindly, I may act and appear to have an understanding but in reality I do not. In this case, my capacity to make a good decision will be limited because I will only be able to copy what my teacher does in a given situation. If however, I take the time and effort to develop an understanding of the teaching, I can extrapolate the lesson learned and apply it in various scenarios, instead of just the one scenario that I copied from my teacher. This helps develop a connection with my teacher and with the teaching itself by going beyond the surface level in search of a deeper understanding.

As I develop in my training, I encounter those with less experience. If I understand that my teacher is able to help me because someone helped them, then I can follow this example and offer help to others as well. This way others can benefit from what has been transferred from the line of teachers before me. The result will be that each generation can improve upon the last. The sharing process is an important aspect of budo as it acknowledges the need for the existence of others.

In order to help others, I must first develop myself because I can only share with others what I have experienced myself. If I take on the responsibility to pass teachings onto others, I should live by them as well. In this manner I set an example for others and maintain my personal integrity which is an essential element to acting honourably. To be true to myself and others, my thoughts, words and actions should be one in the same.

In my budo study as well as in life in general, I can develop a way to keep myself in line with my code of honour. It may start as an internal subconscious voice that reassures me when I make a good decision. As I become more aware of this voice I can be more proactive and use it to maintain my honour. When faced with a situation that requires a serious decision I can simply ask myself, what is the right thing to do? Over the last several months, I have been employing this tactic. I have found that it is not only useful for big decisions, but it is also important for what one might think to be trivial decisions.

For example, a common day may require numerous seemingly redundant decisions to be made. Do I drink a cup of coffee to help wake me up each morning, or do I get up early and start the day with a brief meditation? One choice will inevitably result in a reliance on caffeine to wake up and the other will help me clear my mind and prepare me for the day ahead. Do I rely on the convenience of the cafeteria at work for my lunch, or do I plan ahead and prepare a meal that will serve my body well? Do I point out the errors of my training partners and make them fail, or do I concentrate on helping my partner improve while being sincere. If I miss a class, do I tell my teacher the truth about the reason for my absence, or do I take measures to avoid reprimand? Regardless of the choices I make, they will have an effect on others and inevitably on me too. I must ask myself, what is the right thing to do?

I have found the process of writing this essay and reflecting on the topic of honour over the past several months to be a revealing experience. It has helped me open my inner eye and think on a broader level. I have taken a concerted effort to observe others and the choices they make to reflect on what their intentions might be. I have also practiced self-observation and noticed changes in the way I deal with situations when I take a moment to reflect on the correct course of action. Initially, I can sense how I would I genuinely react, then after taking time to reflect on my decision I can determine if my initial instinct was the best course of action. When my instinct is different, I can reflect on why and make adjustments.

Each of us will at some point encounter major events in our lives which shake (and possibly wake) us up. It may be the death of a loved one, the birth of a child or a life threatening illness. These events might touch us directly or indirectly, but regardless they present us with choices. We can wallow in pity and victimize ourselves or we can allow the situation to take us away from our own individualistic world where we are the centre and help us realize what is truly important in the grand scheme of things. I see budo training much in the same light; however instead of it being one major event, it is a compilation of many events. Each event holds a lesson for us learn from if we take the time to ask ourselves, what is the right thing to do?

Jeff Jodoin
July, 2009